sassysheisme

Posted on April 4, 2004 by sassysheisme

APRIL SHOWERS BRING MAY MOLD

… and other allergies stories. Ah, yes, spring is definitely in full swing here in southeast Texas. Each day, our cars are covered in a thick, yellow dusting of pollen, the air is full of pollen as well, and since we didn’t have a good, hard freeze this “winter”, mold is rampant everywhere and the mosquitos will be thicker than ever. But I digress…

It is now April. March Madness is over and I must say that I did so badly at guessing who would advance, that the last team I didn’t mess up on (Duke) lost last night, so none of my picks survived. Sigh. It’s never been this bad!

On a better note, I’m now working 5 days a week at the church I’ve worked for off/on for several years. Two of the days pay less than the other three, but any money is better than none, and since I’m working full time hours, I’m hopeful that I’ll be eligible for insurance. I could use the help in the dental dept and it wouldn’t hurt to have a complete physical, either. So, keep that in mind when you’re thinking of me.

Also, at the church, after 4 1/2 years, they’ve called a pastor, a young man who brings great leadership and discernment. The vote takes place on Easter Sunday, and though I’m sure they’ll vote him in, many of the more seasoned crowd isn’t sure what they think of this guy yet. As far as from the view from an employee standpoint, I’m just excited to have a boss again… maybe some things will change, maybe they won’t, but at least it’s a step in the right direction.

On another note, I think I’ve finally narrowed down my church searching. I haven’t been visiting different campuses lately, because I wanted to step back and decide which denomination I felt most aligned with. I also wanted to give myself time to grieve my losses and to seek God to know which way I could best worship. Please keep that in your prayers as well and I will update more about that soon.

random

Posted on March 20, 2004 by sassysheisme

ANOTHER BLONDE/CLUMSY MOMENT

This scenario may be tough to visualize, but Thursday I was transferring last year’s financial files out of my co-worker’s office to make room for this year’s files (fiscal year is April – March). Last year’s files are housed in a filing cabinet across the lobby of our suite. Not a vast distance, but the trip is tedious when you have to carry four (actually 4 1/2 crammed into 4) large file drawer’s worth of files across the room.

I was already tired (after unloading the 2002-03 files into banker boxes to be hauled away along with 10,000 copies of purchase orders) when I got a brilliant beyond brilliant idea. The roommate is always telling me I need to think lazy… meaning finding the easiest way to do something difficult… so I thought I’d found a lazy, convenient way to move the files. From personal experience, I should know that ideas I get when physically tired aren’t always thought out as well as they should be. Keep that in mind.

Ahem… try to picture this. In my co-worker’s office she has a two-tub filing system that hangs in a plastic frame with wheels. I store the alpha numeric cardboard filing systems I use to help with sorting, a pen and that fingertip sticky stuff I use to help me with gripping the papers. That’s it. My co-worker uses the top of the filing system as extra desk space when she’s got one too many files for her desk. I was thinking about how I could make life easier for myself when I spied the two-tub deal in the corner. I thought, “hey, this has wheels!” so I stuffed the tubs full and started to wheel it across the suite.

Who’d have guessed that these plastic things can’t hold that much weight? (ha ha) Five feet from my intended destination, the unit groaned and wobbled, then the brackets snapped in half. The tubs were stuffed so full that when they bounced and tipped over on the floor, not one file or piece of paper fell out.

I cracked up while the lady in the desk behind me tried to keep her laughter to herself. I told her it was okay to laugh… I realized that it was a stupid plan to begin with, but I was so tired, I just had to try it! We laughed, which drew attention from my co-worker’s office and she started laughing when I showed her the pieces of the broken apparatus.

So much for being lazy, right? One of the maintenance guys thinks he can glue it back together and it may hold the 5 pounds of stuff I usually keep in it. He took it away and it hasn’t been returned yet.

Too funny… then the lady who witnessed my clumsy/blonde moment broke her letter opener about an hour later and she couldn’t fix the heavy duty stapler (which someone had put staples that were too big in it), so I didn’t feel so bad…until my co-workers started to call me, “Destructo.”

All further brilliant beyond brilliant ideas I get when physically tired will be filtered through the roommate who is lazier and much more clever than I am… until which time I prove that my ideas are not destructive. Trust me, it’s much safer for office furniture everywhere.

receptionist ramblings

Posted on March 15, 2004 by sassysheisme

MORE TALES FROM THE RECEPTIONIST

I cannot say what her real name is, so I’ll call her Sadie. Sadie calls the switchboard periodically — in fact for a while she called us once a week to tell us some wild story. She’s been banned from the church because she used to charge the pulpit during sermons, screaming and calling the pastor names. We’re not really sure how she gets use of a phone (she’s not supposed to have one where she lives), but occasionally she rings us to liven up our day.

The last time I heard from her, she told me that virgins have supernatural power (and nobody told me!) and that she was afraid she was going to kill the drunk man who comes to visit her the next time he came over… because she has this supernatural power and he doesn’t know it. Ok…

Last week she called and said, “The pastor said Sunday that smoking in the house of God is evil,” and she wanted to come arrest the person smoking in the house of God. I told her that I was fairly certain that nobody had been smoking in the building (except for my smoking popcorn incident), and she laughed and said, “oh this was years ago, but I want to arrest him for smoking in the house of God.”

Then she says that she wants to put on a police uniform and arrest whoever it is she thinks is smoking in the church…and if we would please hire her as a security guard she’d be happy to do the job.

“Please keep me in mind,” she says.

Oh yeah, I will.

I go home and tell my roommie about Sadie’s latest call and she says, “that’s odd, there was an episode of The West Wing last week where the president smoked a cigarette in a church and it caused a big ruckus.”

If Sadie is indeed watching The West Wing, then the man she wants to arrest is Martin Sheen.

I’ve watched the last few episodes of The West Wing, just in case she calls again. Any advantage or small clue I can have in these conversations is helpful.

And how is life in your world?

random

Posted on March 14, 2004 by sassysheisme

“SHARON, I THINK THERE’S A FROG IN OUR KITCHEN.”

That’s how my roommie greeted me around 11 o’clock this morning. We had a small monsoon that started around 10:30 and usually, a sustained downpour like that makes a nice puddle in our kitchen beneath the window, but does not usually bring friends into the kitchen.

My head is pounding this morning, as it is raining and also spring in Southeast Texas. This means everything outdoors is coated with a light yellow powder (pollen) and allergy sufferers like me are miserable. This is one of the reasons why, at 10:30, I was still in bed when the rain started.

After the frog announcement, I fumble around for my glasses so that I can accurately verify if there’s a frog in our kitchen. I am asked to go downstairs as the backup in the Frog Relocation Program. Jene’ says Q-bert (this is the name chosen for the frog) is her friend, meaning, that Q-bert will eat mosquitoes outside of our apartment, and therefore, deserves to live. I agree and once downstairs, I verify that indeed, we have a frog on our window sill.

Q-bert looks as if he just lost his tadpole tail this week. He is that froggy brownish green color and looks to be about an inch and a half long. Q-bert appears to be not a tadpole, not yet a frog (sorry for the Britney reference). He looks up at us as if to say, “there’s just too much water out there, can I stay in here with you?” but Jene’ has already grabbed an empty small butter plastic butter dish (or was it a lemon chill cup?) and a paper towel and slowly eases Q-bert into it. She releases him outside and eventually (we know because we checked) he hops away.

Yes, that was the excitement of our morning. We have both taken applicable meds and are feeling much better… well, I am, but Jene’ is still a little dizzy. This means I will drive to the movie later and then we’ll stop by Sam’s to restock on goodies since I am working every day this month and have a slight surplus of cash (which will allow for necessities like toilet paper).

Roommie has now blogged about Q-bert as well. Need to go check that out!

technical difficulties

Posted on March 9, 2004 by sassysheisme

I’M BACK!!

Our DSL is now SUPER FAST… so much better than dial-up. While “offline” I read a couple thousand pages of the Harry Potter series and I started a new book called, Girl Finds God, by Lauren F. Winner. I will blog more about that book as soon as I finish it. So far, it’s been a great read.

Thought to Ponder: On the way home, I meandered through back streets to avoid long waits at traffic lights… and though it may be a slightly longer route to get home, at least I am in motion the whole time, and therefore, the journey itself doesn’t seem to take as long. I laughed as I realized I do this, then thought, “Why can’t I seem to do that in other areas of my life? Why can’t I stay in motion?” A thing to make you say, “hmm…”

Jene’ is off to Republican headquarters to watch the election results trickle in for today’s primary. For the first time in my life I got to vote for someone I know and not only that, I know he’s the best man for the job (it’s so rare to be able to depart from the lesser of two evils voting). He is also an ornery man (it’s always the quiet ones) who likes to grab people’s feet during scary orc sections of Lord of the Rings. Anyway, I will update you on Victor’s progress for his re-election bid for Railroad Commissioner of Texas. Jene’ had planned to be in Austin with Victor & family to watch the election results, but she had a job interview today (HOORAY) and couldn’t make it out of town.

As for me, I got turned down for another position at another church, but they sent me a nice rejection letter, and it was personalized and did not say, “Dear Applicant.” I am working, however, every day this month, which will produce two healthy paychecks in a row. WOO HOO! I can’t tell you the last time that happened… well, yes I can… this time last year.

Other interesting tidbits since I blogged last:

– I cooked meat this evening and I do not smell like the meat I cooked. Bonus. (last week I had to shower after the Great Bacon Incident II)

– I had a craving last week for Maneschewitz matza bread, though I’m not Jewish and matza is not a regular part of my diet. I’m a different combination of “ish.” Amish… Scotish… Irish… and other “ishes.” Not sure what that means, but I will probably pick up a box the next time I pass the kosher section at Kroger’s.

– I learned the cash register system at the bookstore (where I’ve picked up the extra days) in about 10 minutes and even though the little scanner/barcode reader thingy didn’t work most of the time, I did quite well. Kudos to me. I guess all that playing with my toy cash register when I was little paid off.

– I have not yet seen Mel Gibson’s The Passion of the Christ. It’s not that I don’t want to, but I wanted to wait another week or two so I can go to the theater and weep — and not in front of 400 people. It’s still tough to get a ticket to this movie in Houston. From what I’ve read and from the reactions of people I know, Christian and non-Christian, this is a worthwhile movie on which to spend your money.

– Sunday, I went to Mickey D’s to try to win a million dollars, but alas, I wasn’t the chosen one for their contest. Sad, but true.

– I finally received my Hershey’s T-shirt (the one I won January 1st – the good omen T-shirt). It’s a long-sleeved, white T-shirt, with a Hershey bar on the front. Underneath the Hershey bar, it says, “Sharing is Overrated.” Now that I’ve received the shirt, let the good omens turn into good results!

That’s all I can think of right now… I’ll most likely blog again soon. Did you miss me?

technical difficulties

Posted on February 20, 2004 by sassysheisme

SAYING, “NO” UPDATE:

Everyone’s acting like nothing happened. Next.

BLOGGING, THOUGH ALREADY SPARSE, MAY BE SPARSER

Our DSL is switching over to another line, so as of Monday we’ll be without high speed internet access for 5-10 days. I will be able to access e-mails with dial-up, but whenever I try to blog with dial-up, the results are frustrating. So, if I can blog, I will blog. If I can’t, I will talk to y’all in a couple of weeks. Gives me a chance to catch up on correspondence and reading, right?

commentary

Posted on February 15, 2004 by sassysheisme

STILL SATISFIED WITH SAYING, “NO.”

I’ve had time to think and re-think and I still think I did the right thing by standing up for myself. I’ve also had time to think about all the times I didn’t say no and why it’s still so difficult for some to use that word. After all, “no,” is one of two options, the other being, “yes.” “No” is always there, waiting to do it’s job. I’m not saying that a time to say, “yes,” is wrong or doesn’t exist. I just believe, “no,” isn’t used enough.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve spent years not saying, “no.” I’ve spent years saying, “yes,” when I should have been saying, “no,” because I can’t stand conflict. I used to sacrifice my own feelings, self respect, my own rights as a human being because I couldn’t say, “no.”

Over the years, as I’ve dug deep and found my voice, it’s still tough to say, “no,” but I’ve been able to more often and let me tell you, it feels better than being a doormat. Not saying, “no,” when it needs to be said and you wake up with the words, “welcome,” on your back. I think most of the word has been erased off my back, but I think there’s still a W and part of an E still visible. I’m not always able to say, “no,” even now, but I have more discernment, too, and sometimes, it’s best not to say anything. Ah, the third option.

The trouble with, “no,” is that so many people are used to hearing, “yes,” they get angry and take it personally when they don’t get what they want. I still don’t know what I will face tomorrow. Probably nothing, just silence. Still, I have no regrets with my choice of words.

Now that I think about it, I used to say, “no,” all the time, just inside my head… where I was screaming it, but nobody heard me. In fact, I used to stand in the middle of crowded rooms screaming at the top of my lungs and nobody heard me. Nobody was listening. Oddly enough, some people don’t hear the word, “no,” even when you’re brave enough to speak it out loud… calmly, respectfully. All they hear is, “I’m not getting my way.”

Jene’ said that as long as I am being obedient, I am not responsible for how my actions or choice of words is taken. I am not responsible for the reaction. No matter what the outcome, I did what was right. No matter how high on the Black Sheep list this puts me, I did what was right. No matter how people talk about me behind my back, I still did something that I should have done a long time ago — stand up for myself.

Unfortunately, sometimes you do the right thing and you end up homeless (ha ha). Donations can be made at…

Job Search

Posted on February 9, 2004 by sassysheisme

THE POSTCARD OF REJECTION

With the two members of this household both seeking employment, the rejection letters and phone calls are piling up… not to mention the countless possible employers we never even hear back from. My roommate, however, recently received the most impersonal job-seeking rejection I’ve ever seen.

The wording of the rejection was fairly standard — basically, “we aren’t interested in you, your gifts, talents or work history at this time.” The parts that seemed totally impersonal were: a) it was a POSTCARD and not a letter (thus you don’t even warrant a piece of paper and an envelope) and b) the card didn’t even address her personally. It said:

DEAR APPLICANT:

Dear applicant? I read that and thought, “at least reject me personally!” as if the rejection would hurt less or mean more because they thought enough to reject me by name. My roommate, however, thought it was funny and blogged about it herself. Now, she uses it as a motivational tool with me when I face another rejection. “Just think of it this way,” she says. “At least you didn’t receive the postcard of rejection!”

If I do receive a postcard of rejection, we would then have two and that would constitute a collection. Maybe we can charge an admission fee to see our collection of rejection and that can help us pay our rent. I’m going to present this idea to my roommate and see what she thinks. Sadly, I think I may be rejected again. 😉

commentary, sports

Posted on February 2, 2004 by sassysheisme

“WARDROBE MALFUNCTIONS” AND OTHER LAME EXCUSES

Even people who didn’t tune in to the Super Bowl at all knew what happened by the time I got to work today. If the whole purpose of the classless stunt pulled by Janet and Justin (J & J) was to get some publicity and get people talking about them, it worked. Most of what I heard today, even from people I know who are hard to shock, were stunned silent after the halftime show ended last night, and it wasn’t just J & J’s fault. The lyrics to every song included sexual references, but because we have become such a visual nation, I think that increased the shock when Janet’s sleazy dancers appeared and then the wardrobe malfunction happened.

The FCC is now involved and what maybe started as a classless, tasteless stunt is going to cost someone big bucks. I think it should start with the performers, but given we live in a society where accused (innocent until proven guilty) rapists, murders, abusers and pedophiles — who just happen to be professional athletes or celebrities — roam free (because they have the money from their celebrity) and even continue to play and perform, I doubt much happens to J & J but a momentary public shunning and maybe some embarrassment. I think Viacom (who owns CBS and MTV) is going to get a huge fine… but that’s about it.

When Janet’s new CD comes out, will people buy it? Yes. As memorable as the wardrobe malfunction was, the public’s memory is so short, so forgiving, so willing to look the other way, even when a woman’s breast is bared in an attempt to shock 100 million people (that included many children). Besides, it’s easier to forget about it because that’s what the majority will do… the high road, the right thing, is always tougher and is always represented by the minority. Morals just aren’t cool. Nipple shields and wardrobe malfunctions are.

Janet’s new single was coincidentally shipped to radio stations this weekend. Her name was mentioned millions of times today — more press than she’s received in years. The only way to stop this behavior among celebs is to not buy their product when they act like their brains were sucked out of their heads… but that doesn’t happen. If people stopped buying Madonna and Britney’s “music” after their recent stunt, then the next time an opportunity to prove their lack of morals and class presented itself, they might (okay, that’s a stretch, I know) think twice.

This will not be the end of Janet’s career, or Justin’s. They will rise back to the top faster than you can say Dixie Chicks.

sports

Posted on February 2, 2004 by sassysheisme

SOME COMMENTS FROM THE NEWS ABOUT HALFTIME SHOW

Gosh, that was quick. The denial and outrage has been given by all big wigs involved and the performers are calling it a mistake. Here are some comments:

CBS and the NFL disavowed a Super Bowl halftime performance Sunday night that concluded with Justin Timberlake baring Janet Jackson’s right breast.

The incident was so upsetting to the NFL that it suggested MTV won’t be permitted to produce another halftime show.

“We were extremely disappointed by moments of the MTV-produced halftime show,” said Joe Browne, NFL executive vice president of communications. “They were totally inconsistent with assurances our office was given about the content of the show. It is unlikely that MTV will produce another Super Bowl halftime.”

CBS, a sister of MTV (both are owned by Viacom), also appeared to be taken aback by Sunday’s show.

“CBS deeply regrets the incident that occurred during the Super Bowl halftime show,” a network spokeswoman said. “We attended rehearsals throughout the week, and there was no indication this would happen. It did not conform to CBS broadcast standards, and we would like to apologize to anyone who was offended.”

Timberlake said he did not intend to tear the cup off Jackson’s black leather bustier, exposing a nipple piercing shield.

“I am sorry that anyone was offended by the wardrobe malfunction during the halftime performance of the Super Bowl,” Timberlake said in a statement. “It was not intentional and is regrettable.”

If it was a wardrobe malfunction, what was supposed to happen when he reached over there?